A group of friends and I get together every Thursday to talk about life and relationships. This past Thursday, Ally told us about a date she had with a guy from her church. Being that she had heard only good things about him, she was comfortable with him picking her up from her home.
The date started well enough. Dinner was good and the conversation was even better. Seeing that the night was still young and that he had been a perfect gentleman, she invited him in to her place for a quick coffee.
Not along after she made coffee, he suggested they take the conversation upstairs. When she objected to his request, telling him that she was not comfortable, that they keep it holy and not tempt fate, his reply was: My spiritual gift is expressing love through sex.
If you have been going to church for any considerable amount of time, I bet you are picking your jaw off the ground. What he said was utterly ridiculous!
Yes, sex is an expression of eros love (erotic love), but eros is only meant to be expressed within the confines of agape love (unconditional love) which is promised in marriage. And just in case you are wondering, you will not find sex listed as one of the spiritual gifts in the bible.
She also said that when she told him it was best they call it a night, he got angry. He told her he was offended and that she was making a mistake. He told her one of the pastors could vouch for him.
Ladies, though I knew the dating scene was rough out there for those of you who desire to maintain your moral values, I did know it was that rough.
The next time a guy tries to have sex with you…talking about ‘let’s make love’ or ‘I want to show you love’ or ‘I love you’, remind him of the true meaning of love: Love is selfless sacrificial action to serve and meet the spiritual and practical needs (not wants) of another person — whether they deserve it, ask for it, or not.
We all know that in our society, there is nothing selfless and sacrificial about having sex for the guy. The woman on the other hand sacrifices her body, her self-worth, her image, and her future security (in the event of pregnancy).he
Therefore ladies, if he truly loves you, he does not want to put you in that position. If he loves you, he needs to selflessly sacrifice his physical wants to honor you and your moral beliefs. Do not be pressured into doing something that you are uncomfortable with and is against your beliefs all because you want to keep a man. The man who wants you to violate who you are is not worth keeping
To the men out there who are trying to pressure women to sleep with them, all of I can say is come on! You are better than this!